You Don't Judge a Book By Its Cover

So why do you judge yourself by your own cover?

That’s Mike Vining. He’s the undisputed World Champion of “Don’t judge a fighter by their appearance.”

This mild-mannered looking man who could pass as a math teacher moonlighting as a CPA accountant is one of the most feared men to step foot on the battlefield. He’s a body stacker like no other and a bonafide military legend. Not only is he part of the vaunted Delta Force, he’s a founding member of it. He was at Desert Storm, was part of the Iran Hostage rescue team, led the Granada incursion, and clocked many hours in Vietnam on top of other special operations. And he stacked bodies. Just look at the ribbons on his chest and the red shoulder badge.

Yet, even though his eyes convey “I’ve seen some shit in my life” vibes, his overall harmless appearance has turned him into a meme that perhaps some of you are aware of. They say Chuck Norris checks under his bed to make sure Vining isn’t hiding there before he goes to sleep every night.

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Now, we’ve heard the mantra of not judging a book by its cover since we were little children. If we are honest with ourselves, many of us - including yours truly - at some point in our lives have been cooked by judging a book by its cover. Maybe you thought someone was weak when they were strong. This happens all the time at the gym. I’ve been guilty of thinking an overweight basketball player was a scrub only to get torched and embarrassed by him in front of my friends and girlfriend on the court. There are countless of examples. Someone might have appeared poor yet is wealthy. Ignorant but highly experienced. The greater the discrepancy, the more memorable and embarrassing. Ever see one of those [Some Country]’s Got Talent shows where a janitor belts out a song better than the original artist?

The point is, it’s takes a lot of effort to not judge a book by its cover, even if we strive for a perfect score. Our instinct is to fall prey to stereotypes and expectations - concepts that have been baked into our minds as bootloading programs and operate stealthily from blind spots within.

But at least we try.

You know where we don’t try and let our guards down? With ourselves. Think about it. When it comes to how we view ourselves, we have a mental image - a cover if you will - of what, and more importantly, of who we are. And most of us never question it. In other words, when it comes to ourselves, we judge our own book by our cover.

I’m not talking about some consultant fee generating concept like Growth Mindset™ here. That’s just believing that you can improve in something if you put the effort in, in contrast to having a fixed mindset that you can’t get any better. No, what I am telling you is that you don’t have to “look” the part of whatever you strive to be - you just have to become what you want to be.

Take a moment and think about that. It’s actually quite profound.

Your “cover,” which can literally be anything including your physiology, your mental capacity, your pedigree in education or any other measure in accomplishments, your culture, and even your belief system has nothing to do with your “book.”

That means, the way you appear to yourself has nothing to do with what you can be. In other words, you can be whatever you want to be.

Now, we’ve all heard the platitude that you can be whatever you want to be if you only try. So this might not seem like anything new, right? Come on Sang, I read all the way to this point and this is what you’re telling me? Give me five minutes of my life back. There’s even a song that about this!

Yes, I know, and I love that song and listen to it all the time.

The point of this post is not to present something new - it’s to present in a new way. Yes, don’t judge a book by its cover - especially if that book is you!

If you have any doubt about the legitimacy of what I’m preaching, just take another look at the man Chuck Norris fears the most:

I rest my case.