Why I Left the USA...
... and Moved to Singapore
The year was 2016, I had just gotten banned by Apple, our startup was shutting down, Trump somehow won the Republican National Convention, and I was at another one of Life’s Crossroads. Intuition told me that this was one of those forks in the road that only comes every so often in a lifespan.
I love those moments.
It’s as if life collapses into a singularity, and what makes it so invigorating is that you have utter and complete control over the decision you are about to make.
You are at the mercy, of yourself.
Counterintuitively, the most difficult part when facing these moments is not knowing what the fork in the road even is. You see, what tends to happen is that there is an accumulation of events that pile up and begin to impact your emotions over time. Subtly at first, and then ever so subtly it begins to rise until there is some trigger event from the external world outside of your control that cascades and detonates said accumulated emotions.
While there is no way to predict what the trigger will be, interestingly, there is no denying it when it occurs. In my case, it was getting banned by Apple which forced us to consider ratcheting up the ante and suing them, or calling it quits and shutting the startup down. Either way, it became clear that the implications would be life-altering.
We decided to call it quits. Somehow, we didn’t have the appetite of going against the legion of lawyers a trillion dollar company could summon, and we had already generated enough press and awareness after going viral.
That meant, I had to quickly think about what I would do next: build another startup? go back for another salaried job in Corporate America? take a chill-pill, unplug, and travel around the world for a bit?
Insidiously, you might think you know what the fork in the road is, but you really don’t - and that is the danger.
After weeks of stressing, I had a eureka moment: I was asking the wrong question. It wasn’t about “what I was going to do next,” but rather, “where I was going to do what next.” That was the game changing moment for me, and where the true fork in the road materialized. Should I stay in the US, or leave? This was such a different and deeper question, and one that was exhilarating to attempt and answer simply because options expanded to the entirety of the world!
To make a long story short, I chose to move to Singapore through a process of elimination:
It was a place where English was spoken, and this mattered to both me and my wife
I believed that it would be a hotbed for an emerging startup landscape in the ASEAN region, which it did become
It was a safe place to raise young children, and we were planning to start a family
It was centrally located and would allow for us to easily travel around the region and visit my family
and the list goes on..
It’s been eight years since we moved and as time passes, the more thankful I am that we made the move.
In retrospect, I have realized that questioning the default is one of the secrets to lifting the veil that cloaks our minds - it is a message that I want to share with all of you who happen to be reading this.
In my case, I was struggling because I was trying to answer the wrong question (which I thought was the right question). Only by questioning the default, which was “I will live in the US” did the true question emerge. However, it was not obvious to me at the onset because, well, that’s how defaults operate: in our blind spots. We simply assume and never question, and that’s how they lurk and operate in the depths of our subconscious mind as barriers that limit our ability to think creatively.
Most people spend all their time and effort on trying to predict and prevent the triggers. That’s a fool’s game. It’s similar to predicting where the crumbs of the cookie will crumble to. You can’t.
However, what you can do is understand that the cookie itself will crumble. You can become aware that the room is full of flammable gas, even if you won’t know what the spark that finally ignites the flame will be.
And when you become aware, remember: always question the default and the truth will emerge.
➡️ Watch the accompanying YouTube video here: