Find Your Event Horizon
Merge the Three You's into the One
We all have three versions of ourselves. Every single one of us, without exception.
1.
The public version: this is what everyone sees… at work, online, at parties - it is the Facebook or LinkedIn you
2.
The private version: this is what your closest family members of friends sees - very, very few people know this version of you
3.
The secret version: this is what nobody sees, except you in your thoughts - your deepest secrets that nobody except yourself knows of
There is even a fourth version, and that is something you’ve repressed so far into your memory, that you yourself aren’t even sure anymore if it occurred or is just a figment of your imagination.
If you take a moment right now and think about how you express and interact with people, including yourself, you will undeniably come to the conclusion that there are different versions of you floating around in this reality.
The bigger the gap between the versions, the more uncomfortable one is. Many of us even have different sub-versions of the three broad groups. This, too, causes much anxiety because just like lies, one has to “manage” all these versions and decide what to share and what to hide.
The mantra of “Don’t do what you hate” haunts at night and when one looks at oneself in the mirror. We lose faith in ourselves as we succumb to what we define as “vices” in our secret selves. Each one of us has our own personal version of this, be it liquor, social media, or double cheeseburgers.
Escape tends to come in the form of repression, leading to the development of the fourth version - a garbage pile of things you wished away because you don’t want to deal with reality.
I offer another pathway, based on the understanding that the smaller the gap between the versions, the more authentic one is.
There is confidence, and it is genuine. There is love, because by narrowing the gaps, you have learned to love yourself. There is no fakery in the life that you are living, no sham, no ulterior motives. People can sense this about you - and they will naturally follow you, as a guide, and as a beacon.
While it may be nearly impossible to have only one, single version of yourself, you can narrow the gaps between the versions, and reduce the number of them.
And here is the secret: similar to a Singularity or a Black Hole, there is an Event Horizon for yourself. It is the point, that when crossed, nothing can return - including light. Once you start merging all the different myriad versions of yourself, you will at some point hit your own Event Horizon as you approach a single version of you. And when you cross your own Event Horizon, there can be no turning back and you can only go forward towards the single you. All the other versions are forever gone - a part of your history.
True leaders have small to no gaps, and they come in all forms: from a handyman, to an astronaut. The occupation is but a label that does not matter. Neither does money. It is the wealth of your spirit and soul that elevates you - and it is an elevation that others can’t explain, but desperately seek.
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You can be a billionaire but not be a leader. You were just a great business person.
You can be a president but not be a leader. You were just a great politician.
You can be a CEO but not be a leader. You were just a great “corporate” politician.
You can even be a great religious figure but not be a leader. You were just a master liar.
True leaders all have one thing in common: when their time in life is over, their fulfilment in life is complete.
If you want to become a leader, narrow the gaps and strive to only have one single version of you: the truth. This will require great will, which I discussed in an earlier post over here:
Remember, faking it doesn’t make it. And the biggest con job is the one you are making of yourself.
➡️ Watch the accompanying YouTube video here: